Home a[long]way from Home
So much has been written about the global pandemic during the past 12 months that, at times, we can wonder how impactful these regular updates are on our wellbeing. Daily reports are variously sobering or hopeful, so that we might find ourselves vacillating as we negotiate our way through the days. What is striking is the duality of our position. On the one hand, we have a real sense of globalisation as we connect with people across the world who, like us, are learning to adapt to the virus-wrought changes in daily life. Simultaneously, however, our individual worlds have shrunk to encompass our home, families/close friends, colleagues (perhaps) and our immediate environment. To have access to our people, our homes and our work is, of course, a relief and we witness daily the recognition of this fact in our local community.
For those whose families have not been accessible, and for those whose sense of purpose and productivity has been curbed, instead of relief there can be a sense of loss and alienation. Expatriates living in the UK reflect one such group of people. Many have availed of the opportunity to live and work here secure in the understanding they can travel to their home countries regularly and freely. Frequently, we have heard our expatriate neighbours share their sense of good fortune at being able to immerse themselves into the heart of the community – often enthusiastically contributing to local initiatives – whilst also having the freedom to travel to see their loved ones. Clearly, there can be many benefits to having access to this lifestyle; however, there can also be challenges.
The Mental Health Status of Expatriate vs. US Domestic Workers, for example, found that twice as many expatriates as home-based Americans expressed feelings of stress and anxiety, while three times as many expressed feelings of depression. These pre-Covid findings were associated with separation from close family and friends, as well as adapting to differences in culture, religious expression and/or social mores.
Recent evidence indicates an escalation in these challenging emotions in response to the pandemic. This is not surprising if we consider that ongoing travel restrictions continue to curtail expatriates’ ability to be with family in their home countries in order to support them or, perhaps, to grieve them. Additionally, as expatriates tend to be proactive and resourceful in approach, this forced inability to act can exacerbate a sense of bewilderment about what one can do. Lack of control and stress are disempowering and can reduce our sense of personal agency but also of our identity. If I cannot do what I usually do, if I do not contribute as I usually contribute, how do I know how to be or even who to be?
There is so much talk these days of self-compassion that the term can feel like a buzz word, but the reality is that it is meaningful and timely. I hope that our expat neighbours and friends practice it, that they know that this time of separation too shall pass, and they remember that home is not just where the heart is but sometimes where the heart aches.
Contact us if you are an expat and would like to talk to a member of our multi-lingual team. We offer therapy in English, French, Swedish, Spanish, Italian, Russian and Farsi.